烂。。。

很突然的，有一个想法。。。

你真的很烂，西北烂

很用力的去做一个THESIS，

英文 烂 是个 罪

很尽力的去PRESENT

发音 烂 是个 罪

如果有的选我也不想我的英文烂到这种程度

我也想我的英文可以劲到噼里啪啦响

我也想我的英文发音可以准到想OBAMA 酱

一年前 alice 催我写blog，写啊写的不到10个，就没劲了。烂

后来觉得不可以对不起她，于是将之前烂烂的blog删掉

很烂

开始来一这个NEW blog。。。

我也不知道这次这一个会烂几久

烂也要烂得吊

烂也要烂的妙

烂也要烂到有型！！

这么霸道而又暧昧的话！！你敢说么？？？！！

1、什么时候想嫁人了就告诉我,我娶你。

　　3、喜欢我这是革命需要，知道不？！

　　4、你不会叠衣服一边呆着去！以后我来叠！

　　5、我一定要给你幸福，谁也别想拦着。

　　6、只要你要，只要我有，你还外边转什么阿 老实在我身边待着就行了。

　　7、听我的就是,问那么多干嘛，我在你身边,你还走错路!

　　8、跟着我!不能给你幸福是我的错，但谁让你不幸福，我TMD去砍了他

　　9、你等着，总有一天，你会是我孙子的奶奶的！

　　10、你还看 你丫再看我 我就把你吃了！别动 我咬一口

　　11、我都舍不得欺负的人，哪能让别人欺负？

　　12、一辈子那么长，等你几年算什么。

　　13、我爱的人我要亲手给她幸福 、别人我不放心

　　14、我想你的时候我一定要找得到你

　　15、不许你们欺负他！全世界只有我才可以！

　　16、放弃你，下辈子吧！！

　　17、全天下最好的东西都应该归我所有，包括你！！

　　18、先说喜欢我能死啊?别闹，听话。

　　19、有本事你就照顾好自己，不然就老老实实地让我来照顾你！

　　20、听着，我允许你喜欢我。除了白头偕老，我们没别的路可选了~

　　21、你站在那不要动！等我飞奔过去！

　　22、雨停了.天晴了. 女人你慢慢扫屋. 我为你去扫天下了.

　　23、听着，我爱你~

　　24、 某人：高美男，我允许你跟我结婚，引以为荣吧。美男：谢谢，那我以后叫你老公还是亲爱的呢？某某人：称呼我来定，你少掺和

　　25、你是我的 、听说现在结婚很便宜，民政局9块钱搞定，我请你吧！

　　26、你个笨蛋啊 遇到这种事要站在我后面！

　　30、跟我走总有一天 你的名字会出现在我家的户口本上。

　　31、这世界上除了我谁都没资格陪在你身边。

Stay...move....change

It had been a long time for me to think,

to stay? to move? or to change?

There have many uncertainties in my life

my work,

my friends,

my study,

my family,

my day......

A thousand of idea and thought fly over my mind recently, even a simple SPA interview also trigger me to think a lot regarding my future.

Where I want to work?

What I wish to be?

How I can do it?

Who I going to be?

When can I contributed to?

It really not idea how I going to do next...

to STAY calm and remain in my current position

still can sam pat and dig others ppl thgs....

crazy outing and spend a lot of money and time for enjoying ur life

U still young, man!!

Or to MOVE forward,

change ur mind to become maturity

at least this is a real man want to be,

a criteria to be a Man, a son, a husband, a father and head of family.

it not simple and need a lot of experience, fall down and practice.

U not a youth anymore!!

Or change your mind

change your life position and direction,

to do another things that u want to try,

the things that you want to do

.....still want to be a pilot???....

it need a lot of brave and strength

U are able to do that?

a lot and a lot....

that I could not resist and deny that

I am weak,

I need a guideline, a compass, a planner

to help me to clarify and reveal the real about myself

to clear my confusion

to lead a road for my future

as it was a long time I did not open my bible and talk to GOD

may be this is why I am loss,

and confuse

for what I am, Who I am now

Praying hard, is the only things I can do?

Things can become easier if you don't need to think so much

life just once,

make it simple and memorable

Bible is a good teacher,

a life guider

as it tell me

" forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus "

- Philippians 3:14-

I think I know what should I do for the NEXT....

my friends,

May God bless you

Reveal yourself to God

to identify yourself

"who I am

I am who"

无可奈何

人，心，难测。。。

出尔反尔，开空头支票，没说对不起，还一笑而过。

说好的任务到了尾声给你来个刷花枪，耍的你团团转，晕头转向。一句你要做，你不能不做，这是你的质责，你要做。我做，死心塌地的做，鞠躬尽瘁地做，风雨无阻地做。你答应说到此结束，不必在做。。。好！忍气吞声到了交差的日子，以为可以卸下公职，不必卧薪尝胆再战沙场，可以安分守己在白纸上纸上谈兵。。。想想不再有烽火的日子，悠哉悠哉。

君无戏言，一言九鼎。我啊，信以为真。哪知现代21世纪不流行守承诺这玩意，开空头支票是现代人的意事。待我收枪理剑的时候，圣旨下来：“江山不够，再战！”。

“长年累月，累了倦了，刀枪不再利了。”

“没这回事，是你的责任，不能停。”

“再战，江山难剁”

“再攻下一日，准你休”

。。。。。。

再战，烽火连月，延年。。。遥遥无期

无奈，天皇老子最大，抗旨是要断头的！无奈，谁叫我是小将一个！无奈，谁叫大漠江山一望无尽，很强的诱惑是也。

无可奈何，固且再相信一次“承诺”是回事。继续的血战。。。

万夫难挡

圣诞快乐@ Merry Christmas

何谓圣诞节。。。
圣诞，顾名施义是圣婴（耶稣基督）诞生的日子。当时玛丽亚由圣灵怀了孕，在伯利恒的马槽里生了一个婴孩，给他取了个名字叫耶稣—以马内利的意思。圣经路加福音2章10到14节记载: 那天使对他们说：“不要惧怕！我报给你们大喜的信息，是关乎万民的；因今天在大卫的城里，为你们生了救主，就是主基督。你们要看见一个婴孩，抱着布，卧在马槽里，那就是记号了。”

圣诞节的意义现今被商业化。人们看好这普天同庆的佳节，趁机大展拳脚，吃喝玩乐，忘了圣诞节真正的意义。悲啊！圣诞节为的是纪念主基督的降生，他为死而生。身为基督徒，我们应当将这讯息广传，这是给人们最好的圣诞礼物。

往年的圣诞节，我都会随着教会去报佳音，给泗里街的区民逍来圣诞的气息，圣诞的声音。伴着悦耳的圣诞歌声，大伙儿的说笑声，很开心，也很难忘。今年没有参加教会报佳音，没有不舍，既有怀念。。。不知我的兄弟姐妹如今身在它方可好？在这雪花纷飞的夜晚可有把我们思念？可有合家同庆？哈哈，这么感伤。

今年平安夜，给南隆一起打工的朋友拉去喝茶，吃宵夜倒数。。。5个月没见，大家似乎都没变，还是一样。我们靠在泗里街海港的咖啡厅，迎着海风看着烟花，烂漫。可惜在身边的都是兄弟，哈哈。平安夜没有给大家报平安，派涩。。。

圣诞节早上，本大爷又错过了崇拜，咳！主，真对不起您。圣诞夜，家里有圣诞烧烤，和左邻右舍同乐，顺道给圣诞女，老妹过生日。还有教堂的圣诞晚会表演，还不错。

耶稣，生日快乐。希望来临的新年，我会爱主更深，努力侍奉主。。。圣诞快乐

Pilot. vs. Pharmacist

When there are somebody asking me what I am going to be in the future, the answer that I going to give will be " I am doing what I want to be recently". No doubt, after finishing another sememster of my University life in Pharmacy course, I am going to serve the public regarding the medicines. The question is.....It is what I want? Am I qualified enough? Am I mature enough to be a professional?

Previously, when the same question reveal to me, the answer I given must be "I want to be a PILOT." Ya, a pilot, aeroplane driver.......flying in the sky, touch the wind and rainbow, and even feel the sunshine. This was the first future that I want and wish to be since I have thought and thinking. I still remember, during I childhood life, everytime when there have aeroplane fly above the blue sky, cut over my kite, over my house, I am so excited and keep on looking the shadow of the plane... and run try to catch the plane as far as I can untill it disappear in my view. As I desirer it so much, I use paper to built a paper aeroplane (quit big one) and place it on my table and telling myself that " I am going to be a pilot". Yes, I want it, want it so so much...Sound like this past memories such stupid, "u just a little boy, start thinking want to be a pilot!" Oh man, are you serious with this?

No doubt, I really serious, do serious wanna to be a Pilot. Ya, that is what I want, and I will make sure it happen, real to me...I keep on this "dream" till my form five. I still remember that, at that time my teacher want us to fill in our particular for our school magazine. I fill in pilot in my ambition column. After spm, I search a lot of information about pilot, where I going to study, Where I going to work, What are the challenge I going to face, How much I going to spend for the study and training. My parents realise that their son is going to study pilot. Then they start counselling me. They want me quit pilot, saying that "It is too dangerous, so many plane crush annually and you are going to hadle a thousand of people life." Wow, they really want me to stay in earth, touch the ground rather than touch the sky. Evry parent of course want their son get a nice and safe job, no need so busy flying here and there and got excuse for not going home for dinner. But it was my "dream", I mean it.

Things going to change when I am required to join the PLKN. Ya, that three months training made my "dream" not a "dream" anymore. What happen? It is I am so easily influenced by other people when I meet some people? make more friends? explore to more reality of te world? Haha, whatever there are, I know what make my mind changing. In the PLKN camp, I meet a friend who also want to study pilot. He telling me that the first things you must understand and must have is you ability. An ability to handle an urgent situation, to handle the plane and calm down thousand of people in the plane when there have somethings happen in the sun, where nothings you can hold on, nobody you can asking for help as you screan your neighbour when sometings happen. All just yourself... sound like scary to a young boy with 18th years old. From that moment, I look deep into myself and asking myself, "Am I able to do that?" "Am I have such ability?" I know these kind of skill and be learn through training and learning. Umm sound like I can do it...

But.....

I go to search all the things that I going to learn and study if I do really study Pilot. Oh man, all the physic and mathematic things, all about the mechanism of the plane....Come on, I not interest in mechanism at all, so bored. I am lost..... Is that "dream" or just "admire"? I remember everytime I got the physic test, I sure had insonmia. (I also don't know why, no tension, no stress......idiopathic). I pray to God show me the way, help me to make the decision. As I move on my life, I know that pilot is not my "dream" anymore, just like it was a thing I want, no the thing I need. So, after finish matriculation, I choose to be a pharmacist... Hah? Since when pharmacist jumping up in my mind?

The reasons why I choosing pharmacy are very simple.
1. Besides pilot, pharmacist is the only works that I got think of once upon a time.
2. I had a brother with mental retardaed plus seizures, so I want to treat him well with medicine knowledge.
3. I don't want to be a doctor because it going to me five years to study doctor, and I don't like 24 hours oncall.
4. I like chemistry and mathematic more than biology.
5. Support from parent (but they want me to be doctor at the first place)
6. I am not calm and stable enough when handling urgent situation. (This also the reason why I quit pilot.)
7. I hate taking medicines, so hoping study medicines can help me get rid of it. (just like you want to win a war, you must understand your enemy.)

Now I am doing pharmacy and I realise that, YA, thanks God, at least this course did offer somethings that I want. Unfortunately.... I am not sure how long I can remain my interest in the field. The life are always changing, and do for my future. If I am not going to be a pharmacist, what I want to be?? There are certain things in my mind.... maybe I will plan a thousand of apple and become a apple seller? Or a open a restoren? Or become a baker, selling cake in a cake shop? Or perphaps a pastor? There are so much about the future. I am not a good planner, not a good manager, and not a good "dreamer'.

Whatever it is, now I want to be a pharmacist, a good pharmacist (I hope so =))....

Pilot vs. pharmacist; past vs. recent,

pharmacist vs. ??; recent vs. future.